Comments on: Who Says You Have To?

By: Ali

Ali — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 17:24:11 +0000

Definitely best to be careful. It’s easy to get into traps, especially when it comes to consumerism – anything from “I *need* caffeine” to “I *need* a new phone”…

By: David

David — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 08:07:38 +0000

I think we do tend to say “need to” or “have to” a lot. And I agree, a lot of times these statements aren’t necessarily true. But the truth is that we typically say these things because the consequences of not doing it to us makes us want to do the thing like mentioned in the article.

Its funny to see people use these words though, because subconsciously they’ll start to believe they do “need” a certain thing. I always see this happen with my sister, she says “I need to buy” to a lot of things. My sister is a shopaholic! So I think its best to be careful when saying these things cause it can have an effect on our subconscious minds. Use want when it is truly a want, and not a need. And vice versa.

By: bbq

bbq — Sun, 04 Jul 2010 07:09:45 +0000

Hi Ali, thanks for sharing. Well in my opinion its about being optimistic or pessimistic towards the task. I think the first step is to have a right attitude towards things in your life. .-= bbq´s last blog ..Halal Catering =-.

By: Ali

Ali — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 15:17:39 +0000

Thanks Tara! I can imagine it’s something which most people struggle with … our language of “need” and “must” and “should” is probably ingrained in early childhood.

By: Ali

Ali — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 15:16:50 +0000

Thanks Haider … I really like your two questions, and I totally agree about “society” — I’ve often been pleasantly suprirsed to find that the various people in my life are wholeheartedly supportive of what I do, regardless of whether or not it’s something that “society” would find praise-worthy…

I think Kant had some good ideas (that there are moral absolutes) but yes, I agree that duty ethics has a lot to answer for!

By: Ali

Ali — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 14:13:31 +0000

“Could” is a great one, it opens up options and possibilities!

By: Ali

Ali — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 14:12:05 +0000

Yes … there’s always *something* good to be found in any task. (I like the song “A Spoonful of Sugar” from Mary Poppins, with the lines “In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun; you find the fun and snap the job’s a game”…

By: Techquestioner

Techquestioner — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 17:10:41 +0000

I think that realizing that we don’t have to unthinkingly do what our society, family, or peers expect is a mojor step toward personal maturity: “I am an adult, and what I want to do is at least as important to me as what everyone else thinks I should be doing, and I can make my own decisions, accept responsibilty, and live with the consequences of my choices.” In my mind, this is the essence of maturity. In this sense, some people are mature in high school or college. Others comprehend it as they face their 40th birthday. Some people never achieve it.

By: Simplicity « TheUniversityBlog

Simplicity « TheUniversityBlog — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 09:02:07 +0000

[...] Do you really need it? The answer is almost always ‘no’. Do you really want it? That’s a different question. [...]

By: hesbon kerongo

hesbon kerongo — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 08:19:56 +0000

Thanks. Have found myself in the same situation several times and feel bitter about it. this well spoken out and keep up .-= hesbon kerongo´s last blog ..Jun 28- relationship tips =-.