In a recent piece (Words, Writing and Blogging) for Alex Blackwell’s The BridgeMaker, I wrote about how I’m unconvinced by the idea of “finding your passion” that fixates some writers and bloggers in the personal development sphere. It just doesn’t chime well with me. Maybe following your passion will leave you broke; or maybe your life isn’t about one single passion but multiple diverse activities which all bring joy.
Related to all the talk of “passion” is the holy grail of loving your work. Now, I’m all for this one. I do believe that we should spend the bulk of our time doing something which we enjoy and which is meaningful to us: something which lets us sit back at the end of the day or the week, proud with what we’ve done.
But “loving” your work can lead to two problems:
- You’re so in love with what you do that everything else in your life (relationships, finances, health) suffers
- Or, you feel like you’re wrong when you’re slogging through a tough patch or struggling to feel the love for what you do
Love Doesn’t Mean Obsession
Some folk do seem to get pretty obsessed by what they do. Maybe you’ve come across them. (Maybe they’ve made you feel like you’re not productive enough, or serious enough, or sincere enough.) These people work extreme hours – not because they desperately need the money, but because they just can’t seem to stop.
Although we have terms like workaholic to describe people who fall into this trap with career-related work, I’m not sure that we have a corresponding way to talk about artists and creative types who succumb to obsession. We might feel that musicians, painters and writers should approach their craft in an obsessive way: we think this is good for them and for the work.
I’m deeply unsure about that. Sure, I’ve had times when I’ve been pretty obsessive about something, but it’s not resulted in particular good creative work. When you’re that in love with what you do, it’s very hard to get any critical distance. It’s like falling in love: you just can’t accept that the other person has flaws.
You’re also risking burnout. You may be able to keep up the momentum for a few weeks, but working on anything for a long time without a break – especially a creative project – is going to leave you drained of all energy and enthusiasm.
Getting obsessed can be a bit of an excuse. When I spend my Saturdays working feverishly on my novel, I’m doing it because I love writing … but it also means I can ignore the housework and leave my poor fiancé to pick up the slack. Artists can and do end up facing financial ruin because they refuse to look up from their work long enough to pay some serious attention to living a steady adult life.
Being obsessive about what you love isn’t something to be proud about. It’s not good for you. It’s not good for the people around you. And it’s not good for your work.
Tough Love for the Long Term
How can you tell if you really love what you do? It’s probably not because you jump out of bed every morning with a song in your heart and a spring in your step – however much you might think that you should.
When you love what you do, you want to do it well. That means that you stick with it when it’s tough – even when you’re far from loving every minute. It means you take the time to get it right – even when the initial excitement has faded. I’d say that I loved writing and publishing my latest ebook (which you can read about here, if you missed last week’s post) – but I’d be the first to admit that revising, editing and proofreading aren’t my favourite parts of the writing process! I did them not because they’re fun, but because I wanted to be proud of what I’d made.
It’s the same with any project. You take your time because you want long term success, you’re not just after a happy hour or two on a particular day. I can’t think of a single activity where you’re going to enjoy every minute of it as much as the next: you’ll always face some tasks which are dull-but-necessary. If you’re a keen cook, producing a meal might be a joy overall – but chopping vegetables may not excite you in the slightest. If you’re a photographer, you might have loads of fun composing and taking shots– but to get the end results that you want, you’ll need to put in some processing time too.
Loving a project for the long term means pacing yourself. That may mean taking a break to recharge, rather than burning out. Or it may mean carrying on even when you’re not feeling much love, because you know that loving your work is about doing it, not just about the daily ups and downs of emotion.
Tough love means getting perspective. It may mean cutting whole chunks from your novel (and accepting that each individual sentence still won’t be perfect). It may mean ditching an idea which you really like because you know it’s not right for your business at the moment.
Do you love what you do? Then accept that it will be hard at times – and be glad, because that’s how you know that it’s worthwhile.
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I'm Ali Luke, a writer and 
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Ali,
What a great article (especially for writers)….thanks for sharing, I really enjoyed reading this….
.-= Mr. Self Development´s last blog ..Are You Going to Fail Again This Year? =-.
Hey Ali,
I’m fortunate enough to say I love a very big part of what I do as I job, and I know other people who do. From these experience, my conclusion is that if anything, loving your job only enhances other areas of your life like relationships and health. You wanna have there what you have in your work, and you get the motivation to make those work as well.
Cheers,
Eduard
.-= Eduard @ Ideas With A Kick´s last blog ..Get your stuff together instead of using distractions =-.
like to propose Ali. Is it possible to fall out of love with our jobs and career? Over time people can grow apart and out of love. Do we do the same with our careers? You mention early in the article that maybe your life isn’t about one single passion but multiple diverse activities which all bring joy. I completely agree with this. And I am actually just starting to realize this. While I thought I would be “that guy” for the rest of my career, i’m starting not to love it as much and want to pursue other avenues. Maybe what we do in life has a lease and people don’t realize that because our careers are so tied into who we are. Letting go can be some what of an identity crisis for some which is why they keep doing things that they’d rather not be doing.
.-= Greg´s last blog ..So You Didn’t Get To Do What You Wanted This Weekend. =-.
Sorry Some Of My Post Got Cut Off:
It’s great to love what you do and to commit to it. But there’s a question i’d like to propose Ali. Is it possible to fall out of love with our jobs and career? Over time people can grow apart and out of love. Do we do the same with our careers? You mention early in the article that maybe your life isn’t about one single passion but multiple diverse activities which all bring joy. I completely agree with this. And I am actually just starting to realize this. While I thought I would be “that guy” for the rest of my career, i’m starting not to love it as much and want to pursue other avenues. Maybe what we do in life has a lease and people don’t realize that because our careers are so tied into who we are. Letting go can be some what of an identity crisis for some which is why they keep doing things that they’d rather not be doing.
.-= Greg´s last blog ..So You Didn’t Get To Do What You Wanted This Weekend. =-.
Ali,
As usual, your post strikes a chord. Let me share my experience with you and your readers.
Unfortunately, I have a short attention span and tend to get bored easily. I have a restless nature.
It finally dawned on me how to alleviate the pain and suffering I had put myself through since childhood. The solution was obvious, my dear Watson: cultivate as many hobbies and interests as possible.
For example, I love to chop vegetables–a guy has to eat, after all–but only for a short time. Moment I get bored, I quickly move on to something else I enjoy without wasting any time. I run one errand only or complete only one household chore. Once again, I quickly get bored, so I move on to the next project or assignment. If I really feel restless, nothing beats a casual stroll in the wild, open yonder to heal the mind, body and spirit. Moment that is done, return to the computer and maybe write a poem. And keep yourself on your toes like this, so as to save on time. Try not to day-dream too much…
Again, I do not advocate this method for everybody (maybe you are not as eccentric as I am, and good for you; I am nobody’s role-model at all). However, this works for me, and I find I am able to accomplish quite a lot during the course of the day. And I feel a sense of satisfaction when it is time to go to sleep at night. I feel like I have paid my dues, and I have checked a lot of stuff off of my to-do list. Cheerio.
Great article! Also appreciating the bold text in the content
.-= Sam Strong´s last blog ..Consumption =-.
我觉得你说的很对，但是发现很多都只是说爱了之后的结果而不是原因，即如何获得这种爱。比如workaholic，我认为这一方面《企业生命周期》的作者爱迪斯就说的很不错，他把人分成了PAEI四种，而workaholic就是属于极度P—型，而其他三个象限缺失。一个真正热爱工作的人，必然是能够平衡PAEI四种角色和性质的人。
Completely agree with the Japanese workaholic above
Ok, aside from the fact that the whole “passion” argument is overused and now lacks real meaning, you can have a great life and career without having a “passion” for it. If you have that good for you, but it’s hardly necessary for success or happiness. I think to a degree at this very moment in time most 1st world cultures are simply spoiled. Until less than 100 years ago most people were pre-occupied with survival, not finding their passion. Very nice post Ali.
Wow, thanks for the comments, all!
Mr Self Development, cheers! I guess a lot of what I write is useful for writers, since that’s the standpoint I come from. (I’ve thought several times about starting a blog about writing, but I’m trying to take my own advice and limit the number of things I’m working on.
Eduard, yay, good for you! I agree, too; enjoying my work means I’m much nicer to live with. The one thing I’ve noticed is that I’m less inclined to exercise (it used to be my form of stress-relief, and now I’m less stressed!)
Greg, great question with “Is it possible to fall out of love with our jobs and career?” I may have to do a whole blog post on that! In short, yes. We grow and change as people, and so our feelings towards our work change. I personally like to have variety and new challenges in my work — I get bored very quickly — and I’d hate to do the same thing day in, day out. What I particularly like about my current work is the freedom to shift and adapt what I actually do — I get to make up my own job description. (In the past year or so, I’ve transitioned from purely freelance work, getting paid per hour, towards more entrepreneurial projects.)
Archan, I completely sympathise there, I too get bored easily. That’s an interesting way of working — to some extent, I do that (when I get bored of writing I’ll do the dishes, etc) — though in general I find that I lose time switching between tasks. I suspect I generally task-switch on a slightly broader level than you, eg. I’ll spend a day on my novel, then a day on my ebook, then a day doing paid blog posts, etc.
Sam, I had you in mind when I put the bold text in.
程志鹏, I’m afraid I only speak English (and a very small amount of French and German)!
Marc, I think we’re spoiled too — I mean, sheesh, I make a living by sitting in a nice warm room at a computer and typin: my great-grandad was a coal miner. I doubt he had a “passion” for it, but it put food on the table for his wife and five kids.
I certainly wouldn’t want to condemn people to a job that they disliked, but I do think that sitting around waiting to find your “passion” is a mistake! I find it quite hard to know if I’ll like something or not until I’ve given it a go, and I feel that getting out there and getting stuck in to *something* is as good a way as any to figure out what really makes you happy.
Ali, Hi first time on your blog I found you through Alex Blackwell’. I thank you for shedding light in this matter. I am a mom of a 3 year old and I do most of my blogging and networking online once I’m done with dinner, gave my son a bath, and put him to sleep. I truly believe we are on this planet to overall cherish the wonderful people in our life. I do agree 100% of what you shared here especially with “pacing myself.” Sometimes I catch myself getting caught up with work (having 2 business with my husband) too much the last 2 years that my intention this year was to do more self-nourishing activities such as qiqong, meditation, and spend time in 3′s
1.) Silence
2.) Stillness
3.) Solitude
And my Family is my main priority and mastering the TRUE ART of relationship building. I believe every moment is fleeting. We must always cherish those we love abover everything.
Thanks Ali
Love Light & Blessings
Therese Miu
.-= Therese Miu´s last blog ..The Blissful ART of Being Single—Loving Yourself =-.
This really struck a cord for me Ali. I know I can sometimes be a little obsessive when I enjoy something and I have had times with blogging that this comes out… the problem as you mention here is that I find I am all guns blazing one day and then I get burnout! I am determined not to make the same mistake with my blog, so I have tried to nip this tendancy in the bud and to grow it naturally i.e. taking time offline, keeping the balance etc…so far it is really working and 6 months in my love for blogging is stronger than ever. Thanks as always, I love reading your posts.
“Although we have terms like workaholic to describe people who fall into this trap with career-related work, I’m not sure that we have a corresponding way to talk about artists and creative types who succumb to obsession. We might feel that musicians, painters and writers should approach their craft in an obsessive way: we think this is good for them and for the work.”
I think a workaholic is a workaholic no matter what line of work they’re in – whether it’s ‘day job’ work or creative work. I’ve been reading Australian visual artist Hazel Dooney’s blog (http://hazeldooney.blogspot.com) for quite a long time. She usually posts every day and talks about how hard she’s worked to become both financially and artistically successful – working all hours of the day, every day of the week, often with harsh chemicals. Surprise surprise, her latest post (now two weeks old) tells us she’s in hospital for exhaustion and depression. I feel for her but I’m sure I’m not the only reader who saw it coming.
“Artists can and do end up facing financial ruin because they refuse to look up from their work long enough to pay some serious attention to living a steady adult life.”
Thank GOD someone has said this. Thanks Ali!
Therese, glad you found me, and welcome! I usually write one guest post a month for Alex, so you’ll see me pop up there once in a while too.
I love your three S’s … that’s a great way to keep a focus on having the crucial internal-time that we need to stay sane. It’s going to be a good few years before I think about kids, and I have huge admiration for people like you who are juggling work and little ones!
Jen, cheers! And really glad you’re finding a balance with blogging; I totally burnt-out on my first attempt at a “professional” type blog, it just ended up being a chore and a bit of an albatross around the neck…
Chloe, how sad to hear about Hazel, especially because yes, I agree that it sounds like something which could’ve been headed off. I wish we didn’t have this rather macho element where people feel that working insanely hard is a *good* thing. I do it a bit myself, and it is neither healthy nor, in the long run, at all productive! I do wonder whether sometimes people get a bit depressed or down, throw themselves into their work, and then perpetuate the cycle.
Glad you agree on responsible artistry. There’s this myth that real genius creative types just can’t pay any attention to things like taxes and rent etc… I’m extremely unconvinced by that! That’s not genius, that’s plain irresponsibility.
Passion is definitely the fuel and it’s how we blast through the tough stuff and make the most of what we’ve got.
.-= J.D. Meier´s last blog ..Sites I Follow for Insight and Inspiration =-.
“Although we have terms like workaholic to describe people who fall into this trap with career-related work, I’m not sure that we have a corresponding way to talk about artists and creative types who succumb to obsession. We might feel that musicians, painters and writers should approach their craft in an obsessive way: we think this is good for them and for the work.”
THANK YOU for making the distinction between being obsessive and taking a more well-rounded approach to creative work.
I come from a family of artists where only those who work obsessively are considered “real” artists. Those of us who may have loads of creativity but also take time to manage other aspects of our lives are considered non-artists. Thanks for the alternate view on this…
great as usual ali
J.D, interesting thought on passion as fuel — that suggests it needs replenishing (which I think it does, especially when passion’s linked with creativity).
Barbara, you’re welcome! I’m sorry to hear about your family — it is perfectly legitimate (and, to me, more so) to be an artist who is a rounded person, rather than someone obsessed. If nothing else, art needs life, or it can become very inward-looking.
Farouk, cheers!
Ali, you bring up a very good point that we have no term to describe obsessive creative people beyond the generic “workaholic” label- and the even better point that getting rabidly obsessed with your work without critical distance is going to make your suck!
It’s all about pacing ourselves for the long term, even though our emotional human minds can’t really grasp it- we can’t really know what our work will feel like down the road. But how we feel matters. Have you ever churned out truly top-notch work while you were burnt out with your work? I highly doubt it.
Pacing is gold.
Thanks, Travis. I’m going to write a bit more about the real dangers of getting too obsessed by your work (probably later on today). Will see if I can come up with some sort of label for creative obsession (I wonder if it’s almost close to being possessed or consumed by the work).
Yes, pacing is really important. I really struggle to do good work when I’m just flat-out tired of working: and if I take several days’ break from writing, I always come back refreshed and raring to go!